Why Hello!

Here I am, 2 and 1/2 years later! Lots of things have happened, in the world and in my personal life. The biggest I'd say is that we no longer live on a Texas Homestead (which was really just a city plot 2 blocks south of the highway that separated the town from the wilderness and farm plots). We returned to Oregon a year ago. That's right, we have been enjoying our first home as homeowners for a year now.  We bought a 100 year old house in a small town, walking distance to just about everything in the town. The house needed some immediate attention, and still needs lots of work, and so did my extended family. In the meantime, we homeschool the girls and love on the dog and the cat. We had added new chicks to our flock (half of which were enjoyed by Hawk) but then rehoused the girls with a friend before leaving Texas as moving the birds 2000 miles didn't seem worth the trouble. We have just started talking about adding some new feathered friends into the mix this next spring. Lots of construction plans in the near future.... Maybe I'll share some before and afters in the future. I have found dance again. The Mister is enjoying his new job (still flying planes) and the girls are as busy as ever dancing, riding horses, climbing on things, swimming, catching crawdads, etc.

To be honest, I paused working with this site because of the time commitment and my priorities had shifted to other things. In the back of my mind there was also a growing fear for my children's internet anonymity and safety. I am still hesitant to tell our stories in such an unguarded way as a blog, and so have focused on a heavily screened Instagram and Facebook account. But the storytelling! I miss the storytelling. I have never wanted to be a political writer or to write about things where I have to deal with internet trolls. So I paused. I wrote my stories in journals and to specific people on messenger and group texts. I have started escaping into the woods to dance and write poetry and reframe goddess myths in my own words. I have always enjoyed growing in private and, when i feel confident, inviting people to notice what I am doing now.

So, since I have come back here, I must have finished a breathing-in growth cycle (borrowing the idea from Waldorf educational theories) and am ready to breath out and interact with people in this way again. Or at least the interface of the blog-sphere. I have noticed I take less photos because I am sharing my life with the ones I missed so dearly while we were in Texas. Instead of needing to take photos to remember the stories so I can share them with lifelong Friends, Aunties and Grandparents, they are the ones involved in the memories. I am working to shift my habit and capture memories for the girls for later, when we want to look back and remember that silly afternoon at the museum/park/coffee shop with so-and-so and how different we all looked "back then."

I have some other deep thoughts and feeling just below the surface I want to share with all 12 of you who may find your way back to this blog. But I'm not quite ready to make those permanent additions to the inter webs just yet. Which always leads me to ask: Do my thoughts and feelings really need to be blasted all over the inter webs? Can sharing them face to face with a safe person or in my journal be enough? This space helped me through that rough part of transitioning to parenting two kids without much real life help, and now...what to make of this space? I have this place, how shall I use it??