Friday, October 5, 2012

Seasonal jealousy

I'll be honest: living in Texas has made me unnecessarily jealous of everyone else's autumn! This last week or so all I hear (well, read actually) on blogs, Facebook, etc is about leaf colors, cold air and even frosts.

Enter Jealousy.

It's been 4 years since I lived in the pride lands of Portlandia and I haven't experienced a proper autumn in all that time. Blizzard-y Winter, yes. Hellfire Summer, double yes. Hayfever Spring, plenty. Beautiful Autumn, not so much. Everything here is still green, lower 80s, tiny bit of clouds who may or may not rain. No fog, no mist, no sweaters, no cold winds, no scarfs or hats, no extra hot mochas.

Until today! It's supposed to get down in the forties. Finally! I may wear socks to the Denton Herbal Society's All Things Garlic class at the library (in addition to other socially approved clothing). I may drink hot coffee just to hold it in my hands. I may share a blanket with my girl and watch Mary Poppins. I may read up on how to keep the chickens alive in cold weather. I may stop musing about the weather and chat about real issues. Stuff that's kept me offline and in my journal. Stuff that's encouraged spending hours texting and calling friends, playing games and painting pumpkins with my family. Issues best discussed with those I find thicker than blood over a glass of wine.

In blatant, frank, plain honesty, this autumn has rekindled my longing to be close to my loved ones (friends and family). I mask this heartache by calling it jealousy and blaming the weather. But really, I'm tired of not sharing my life with the people I cherish. I choose to handle this situation by sending you mail, electronic and otherwise. Feel free to send me some, too. Maybe when I move back (someday. please?) we can melt smoothly back into the habit of hugging each other often and being present through the daily grind.
Know that you are loved.

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